Tuesday, November 15, 2011

BRAZ3N.....Im consumed!

As you can see ive been insanely busy with shooting, editing, and the hardest piece of this puzzle....MUSIC! Finding a tempo, and attitude some sort of rhyme or reason within footage and sound is Black Magic Artform!...I LOVE IT!

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Rendition: 1 yard stare

1 yard stare:

Similar to the 1,000 yard stare that veterans acquire, the 1 yard stare is a trait that people that work in cubicles or open workspaces pick up as they will avoid noticing anything that is not on their computer monitor.
Dude, I just walked by Lindsay with a plate of donuts and she completely ignored me.

Doesn't surprise me. She is working on closing the accounts receivable for this quarter and has a bad case of the 1 yard stare. 

Rendition: Brain Spin

Brain Spin:

The inability to sleep because of your mind fixating on a thought.
The Lost finale gave me brainspin and I wasn't able to sleep all night. 

Rendition: STFU


1) Acronym used for the phrase "shut the fuck up" for efficiency reasons.
Please stfu because I am trying to read. 

Rendition: Words with friends with benefits

 Words with friends with benefits:

When in the course of playing a member of the opposite sex in words with friends. You or they play provocative words as if to drop hints.

Boy played sex for 13 points
Girl played blow for 16 points
Boy played tit for 8 points

Rendition: productive procrastination

productive procrastination:

n. Doing stuff to keep busy while avoiding what really needs doing. When all is said and done, your room is clean, your laundry is folded -- but you haven't started your English paper.
I should really do my program. But instead, I think it's time for some productive procrastination... Where's the mop?? 
 FINALLY! Ive been crazy swamped all week with Braz3n promotional items and
the day job ive had no time to upload any of these. so here you go enjoy.


Just got these in.
QR on the back that leads to the home page.

And a Co-Branded shirt with FMX East and Loco X.
Very pleased with all these items..

Monday, March 7, 2011

Rendition: Lent trap

Lent Trap:

/lɛnt træp/ noun

In couples where one party is Catholic and the other is not, the unwilling subjection of the non-Catholic to the 40-day ritual of penitence known as Lent.
1. We were going to have dinner at this great new steak place on Friday night, but Joe's got me stuck in a Lent Trap.

2. My wife Jane decided to give up sex for Lent. Worst. Lent Trap. Ever. 

Rendition: fappable


Something that is sexually desirable, or deemed high enough quality that it can be used for masturbation purposes.
Man, that picture is really fappable. 

Rendition: microwave mentality

microwave mentality:

Having the attitude that if something can't be done in 5 minutes or less, it's not worth doing.
Someone's mom: "You know, I just hate how our son never gets his chores done."

Someone's dad: "Yeah it's his microwave mentality. He gets it from you." 
Quickie to keep with the theme...rite under 5 minutes.

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Rendition: dutch oven

dutch oven:

The act of trapping a person under bed covers after releasing vile ass fumes

Dave vomited on the sheets when his wife gave him a white castle dutch oven. 

Rendition: pixel counting

pixel counting:

The act of staring at one's screen to avoid bullshit at work.
Yea I missed the big catastrophe at work today as I was too busy pixel counting. 


Friday, March 4, 2011

FMX East Circus poster, printed and ready!.

Rendition: Perfectionist Paralysis

Perfectionist Paralysis:

The inability to start on a project, assignment, essay or any creative task due to the fear of not getting it perfectly right.

Joe: You haven't started writing your paper yet?
Bob: Nope
Joe: Isn't it due tomorrow?
Bob: Yep.
Joe: I thought you went to the library and did your research, made your notes and wrote your outline.
Bob: I've got perfectionist paralysis. 

Rendition: superstistics


The use of prior evidence of one event to predict the outcome of another unrelated event - from the words superstitious and statistics.

1. Toss a coin and get heads 100 times in a row and use superstistics to conclude that the next toss is more likely to be tails than heads.

2. A well known superstistics conclusion: "The outcome of Washington Redskins home football games has correctly predicted the winner of every U.S. presidential election since 1936." (snopes) 

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Rendition:Russian Toilette

Russian Toilette:

After sitting on the toilet to poop, you notice that there is less than one-quarter of a roll of toilet paper, and no spare in the bathroom. You decide to poop anyway, gambling on the fact you will have enough toilet paper to have a satifying wipe.

Husband: "Honey, I just played Russian Toilette, and lost"
Wife: "Sucks to be you. Try not to bite your fingernails" 
Yes its live traced...Doing these on the quick and dirty....meeh

Rendition: retard in aluminum foil

 retard in aluminum foil:

What a lady's knight in shining armor becomes when she really gets to know him.

I thought he was my knight in shining armor. Turns out, he was just a retard in aluminum foil! 

Rendition: Laborhood

Labor Hood:

The neighborhood in which you work, if different from the neighborhood in which you live.

Nah, I don't wanna hang out in SoHo tonight. I try to avoid my laborhood on weekends. 

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Rendition: Bipolar Texter

Bipolar Texter:

An individual who will suddenly, mid-conversation stop responding to you via text. Or, an individual who has reckless emotional swings through text message.

Jamie: "Hey Steve did you talk to Chelsea last night.
Steve: "Yeah dude shes such a Bipolar Texter"
Jamie: "Yep, she does that to everyone"

Rendition: pop a squat

pop a squat:

to sit down or to take a seat.

Yo, pop a squat over here. 

Saturday, February 26, 2011

Rendition: Work Mouth

Work Mouth:

A form of self-censorship practiced at work to avoid offensive or cuss words. Typically includes cuss-replacements you learned from your grandma. Potentially embarrassing if accidentally used outside of work at parties or in the company of your drunk friends.

May also be used in the company of grandparents, teachers, preachers, and others who disapprove of cussing.

Does not apply to all professions. Musicians and construction workers have no need for a work mouth.

At work:
-Did you just say fuck?
-Yeah, sorry. I forgot to use my work mouth.

At a party:
-Did you just say fiddlesticks?
-Yeah, sorry. I still have my work mouth on. 

Rendition: president please

President please:

Reaction of something that is unbelievable.
Usually used as a more politically correct substitute of n***a please.

"Yo dawg, i had success with this fine ass asian dime last night. She was real receptive with my game that I spat."

"President please"

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Rendition: First


a word that is said when you are the first one to post a comment on a video, picture, article on the net
(looking at video on collegehumor.com.. there are no comments yet)
you writing the first comment : fIRST 
 Most folks that do this are lameasses, just something that never made ANY sense to me. STUPID!

Rendition: bowl noob

bowl noob:

Someone who puts a bowl in the dishwasher facing down with a less than 45 degree angle of attack. Hence the dishwasher can not wash the inners on the bowl.
Who's the bowl noob? CBA coming home to sh*t. 

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

FMX East Circus Poster

Good friends of ours ran off and joined the circus....NO! not that circus..THE REAL CIRCUS!. Working on some promotional items for them to make a lil scratch. Enjoy!.

Below is my second attempt at some video editing.. enjoy.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Rendition: Unbrella


An umbrella turned inside out by forceful wind.
It won't keep you dry but if you want to, you can stand under my unbrella. 

Rendition: social chameleon

social chameleon:

someone who changes the way they interact with people depending on who they're with.
Chris is such a social chameleon, hes such a nice guy at chess club, but such a dick on the football team. 

Rendtion: Going Ham

Going Ham:

a derivative of the word mayhem
meaning to raise mayhem
Shelley hit me in the balls and ran, I'm going ham the next time i see her. 

Rendtion: Page Clicker

Page Clicker:

An eBook that is exciting to read and hard to put down.
While reading Neil deGrass Tyson's Autobiography on my Amazon Kindle and his personal account of the events of September 11th 2001 I found the eBook to be a real page clicker as I became absorbed in the story. 

Rendition: Love


nature's way of tricking people into reproducing

Rendition: Xio


"Kisses, Boners, and Hugs."
Used as an alternative to xoxo
"Happy Valentine's Day, darling. I love you so much!
Xio, John" 

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Rendition:Some-sex marriage

Some-sex marriage:

A marriage where a couple participates in minimal sexual activity.
“Bill and Wanda’s sex life was almost non-existent. They had a some-sex marriage.” 

Friday, February 11, 2011

Rendition: If you will

If you will:

1. An phrase overused by those trying to sound sophisticated and/or intelligent.

2. A phrase used frequently by Tobias Bluth from Arrested Development.
Tobias: You could say I'm, if you will, 'buy curious'
Man: I can "sprinkle the pudding" if you will.

 With your favorite..FERAL CAT..YAAAAY!

Also a little side knowt, Ive been off traveling and doing some work on the road. Playing catch up with my renditions. I will have them all up soon. W

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Rendtition: idgaf


An acronym for 'I don't give a fuck'.


Used when you don't care about something, or have no opinion on a matter.

Sometimes used without the 'i', ie "I dgaf about her".
Person 1: Hey hey you you I don't like your girlfriend
Person 2: idgaf

Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Rendition: Logophillia

This happens when nerds like words so much, they are sexually excited by them.
When Kevin took his SAT, he was sent into logophilia by the critical reading section.